As couples confront life’s events together—birth, death, success, failure, health, illness, support, and betrayal—it becomes harder to discern the boundaries between each other.

-What’s mine?
-What’s yours?
-What’s ours?
-How can we understand each other and be understood?
-How can we know and communicate our needs skillfully?
-What was the conscious or unconscious dream that inspired us to choose him or her as our partner?
-What is different now?
-What is the best way to attend to our differences, protect our love connection and enhance our well-being as a couple?

Recent advances in neurobiology and relationship research demonstrate that our brains are wired for connection to others for our welfare and survival. My approach to working with couples is informed by these studies; I employ techniques from attachment-based therapies – EFT, Imago, Interpersonal Neurobiology – along with mindfulness-based practices.

Couples Therapy can feel scary at first, especially if the stakes seem high and one of the partners feels he or she has more to lose than to gain. It’s best to take one step at a time. First, each of you might do some research—using friends, referrals, or the internet—to identify two or three therapists who appear most suitable. Next, call them on the phone. Spend 10-15 minutes talking to them.

Finally, agree to make an appointment with one therapist to discuss the pros and cons of pursuing couples therapy.

This approach allows you to:
(a) explore your concerns before agreeing to go further; and
(b) choose a therapist who can provide you both with a secure conversational setting and offers objective understanding and wise consultation.